An Assassin Creed Meme
by TheBlueFoxtrot A Samba
Summary: Basically, I'm just picking at them. 'Cause what is more fun than messing with a bunch of assassins that can't kill you? Name one thing.


So I saw this Mazzaroo's Assassin's Creed Meme on deviantart. Since I can't draw that well and don't have a scanner or anything anyway, I decided to do this.

I do not own Assassin's Creed, but I do love it and I beat both games and I'm super-excited about Brotherhood! I'm quietly squealing to myself right now.

Edit: Still lovin' the series so far, but Ezio isn't so much my favorite anymore. His manwhorism is annoying at this point.

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1. **Who are you and where do your loyalties lie? Templar of Assassin?**

"Yo! I'm Blue. Just Blue. And for sure, I'm with the Assassins. So Altair, you put the knife down. Seriously, put it down."

Altair ignores her and stalks closer. Blue laughs nervously as she stares at him. Then abruptly turns and runs away.

"Guards! Help! ASSASSIN!"

The pathetic excuse for guards run into the alley but Altair has already disappeared from their sight. In reality, he's peeking through the curtain of a rooftop garden.

2. **Who's your favorite character and why? Draw them shirtless XD **(What? That's what it says!)

Ezio Auditore groans as he wakes up. He tries to sit up in his bed but finds that he is strapped to it. As he struggles against the heavy chains over his bare chest, he notices a teenaged, light-skinned, African woman in strange clothing sitting in his chair next to his bed. She has a pad of paper and pencil in hand and there is a heap of discarded, crumpled paper on the floor near her.

"Hello?" he says.

She doesn't glance up as she answers, "Hi."

"Can you untie me?"

"Yes."

She doesn't move to get up, only continues to draw then erase.

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"Aren't you going to untie me?"

"No."

"You said you would!"

"No, you asked if I can untie you. I can untie you, but I need to draw you since you're my favorite."

"Uh-huh. And just what have I done to earn your favor?"

The girl sighed, ripped the sheet of paper out of the notebook, balled it up, and tossed it in the pile. Looking up at him, she said,

"You grew a beard and actually have a personality."

3. **Got any fan characters? Introduce them. (No own characters? Draw an Assassin's Creed Dance Party! Go nuts lol)**

Shaun is doing the robot to the beat of Lady Gaga 'Just Dance'. Ezio is dancing with Lucy while Desmond glares bloody murder. Altair is standing next to him.

"He has stolen your women?"

Desmond grunted in reply.

"Would you like to get her back?" Altair holds up a long, curved knife.

Desmond glances at him.

"I can't kill him. I don't know if he is a direct ancestor. If I kill him, I might not be born."

"Sucks to be you."

4. **What would happen if your character/s met Altair or/and Ezio? (No characters? Draw yourself instead.)**

Altair looked at the girl standing in front of him. The top of her head just barely reached his chest.

"Hi."

"Hello," he replied.

"Can I see your sword?"

"Um…"

5. **Le gasp! You've been sucked into a wormhole and blasted into 1191 A.D. What are you doing? **_Screw that! I'm hotwiring this baby to 15__th__ century Italy!_

Ezio stalked across the roof of a building keeping his target in his sights. The man wasn't one of the conspirators. Ezio just didn't like him. Just as he was about to perform a leap of faith into a hay pile that was in the man's path,

"Watcha doin'?"

"Son of a – "

He spun around and was face to chest with a somewhat familiar girl.

"Were you gonna kill that guy?"

"Yes."

"Can I do it?"

"You want to be an Assassin?"

"Well, it depends on how many courses I'd have to take and for how many years. My current major will only be for two and right now I have five classes. And Assassination is something that people will always need so I shouldn't get fired unless I really suck at it."

"…oka-aaay."

"So I can join?"

"Oh CENSORED no!"

"Aw come on!"

6. **Oh noes! You have been captured by Templars! How do you plan to escape from Abstergo?**

"THIS IS THE SONG THAT DOESN'T EEEEEEEEEEEEEEND! AND IT GOES ON AND ON, MY FRIEEEEEEEEEEEND! SOME PEOPLE STAAAAAARTED SINGING IT NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS! AND THEY'LL CONTINUE SINGING IT FOREVEEEEEEEEEEEEER JUST BECAUSE…"

"Professor, I can't take much more of this," random lackey whined.

"Oh, shut your whining," random grunt said, "There's no way she can keep this up."

"She's been keeping it up for a week!"

"Your complaints aren't helping. And it's not bothering Professor Vidic," Grunt pointed at Vidic who was typing on his computer.

Lackey sighed. He turned to the professor

"You're right. Professor, forgive my attitude. I just…Professor? Professor?" he waved his hand.

Vidic looked up like he just saw him. He pulled an earbud out of his ear.

"Did you say something?"

"THIS IS THE SONG THAT DOESN'T EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEND!"

"Is she still on about that? How do you grunts and lackeys stand that?" he put the earbud back in his ear and returned to his work, not noticing the twitch that Lackey was developing in his left eye. Grunt started humming along with the song. Lackey slowly turned his head to Grunt. Then he walked out of the room and went to a door that said in big black letters ARMORY.

7.** Obligatory shipping question! Do you have a favorite ship?**

Giovanni Auditore and Maria Auditore. You know…since they're the only actual official ship so far.

8. **Draw**(Write)** the crackiest pairing you can think of**

Rebecca stalked through the loft looking back and forth for signs of anyone else. She made it to the Animus 2.0, activated it, and used it on herself. Going through the sequence, she found herself materializing in an all too familiar study filled with shelves of books.

"Peace and safety, my dear," a deep, ancient voice came from the old man seated in the chair behind the desk.

Rebecca smiled and walked around to him.

"How's it goin', Al?"

Putting a hand on the back of his neck, she leaned down and kissed him.

Al Mualim and Rebecca Whatever-her-last-name-is.

9. **ROFL! You know what else is fun? Crossovers! Do a crossover…of DOOM!**

Ezio Auditore stood atop a tall tower in the once beautiful city of Venice. Now it was in ruins, an explosion had destroyed most of it. An explosion he'd been right in the middle of, and yet somehow survived…and adapted.

Ezio jumped off of the roof and hovered in the air high above the ground, an electrical pulse from his arms keeping him aloft as it slowed his descent. Landing on the ground, he walked on, past the dead and dying. He had made it his personal mission to find the ones responsible for this destruction and death. The ones responsible for the death of his father and brothers and make them pay.

"Help! Help!" a woman screamed from an alley that Ezio was passing. Two men stood over her. One of the men turned to him.

"Mind your own business and you won't have to die today," the man with a knife said.

Ezio smirked under his white hoodie. He held up a fist and a blue electric charge danced around his arm.

"I don't think I'm the one who is going to die today."

Assassin's Creed II and Infamous

10. **All done. Now tag someone else.**

I tag everyone who read this thing! Ha! Doesn't mean any of you will do it. You're probably not even gonna review. And I worked so hard on this too.


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